EVOLUTION BY DESIGN

That was the name I gave to my dream business when I lived in Boone, NC, many years ago. It was a counteraction to the pat one swoop method of interior designers. Buy something you love, use it, move it to the place that feels right. Add the next piece or two…in other words, let your surroundings evolve as you live in them, as you see how you function in your space. I thought it was brilliant! It was how my own place evolved. It is how this place in Ajijic, Mexico, is evolving. In a way it is how my life, my spirit and emotions, are evolving…slowly, by design.

I am amazed every day by what we’ve done, by how in the past several months our lives have changed, evolved, morphed into something so totally different. By design. Virtually nothing is the same, except our kitchen stuff. (They were right to say bring it. Quality here is poor.) Even our clothes change as we realize what works here and what doesn’t-keeping travel to other climates in mind. We bought a car, another Honda, but driving here is VASTLY different. I found myself finally exhaling with relief yesterday when we went to an Auto Zone (!) for a windshield screen. The store looked nearly identical to the ones back in NC (except for the signs in Spanish). Finally something familiar!

We slowly add an item here or there as we realize what we need, what might work. There’s no doing anything fast here-it took weeks to find a set of shelves for Ben’s office and after hitting 6-8 stores we still have no stand for the (giant) TV waiting in the box behind my chair. Now and then a delight like the special Oaxacan rug in a consignment store, or the wonderful handmade/painted jewelry rack Ben found at a recent studio tour, shows up. The den looks better with the rug in it. The corner reserved for my scarves and necklaces has come together-a vignette pleasing to my eye-and functional as well. But the “dream” of creating a Mexican style decor fades to the background, no longer important considering the effort and money it takes to make it happen. That realization in itself is an evolution.

In the midst of it all my mind and spirit evolve as well I hope. A visit to a nearby estate sale last week sent me into tears and depression. Why??? It took a day or two and the support of distant sisters/friends to see the tie to a childhood lived with mother and brother who always felt cheated, always felt they should’ve had more, been more. Looking at my own brand of discontent I detect that in this case it is the need for more useable outdoor space here at home that beckons. Something comfortable to lounge in-an evolution of space. Part of it-that discontent-will take a lot longer to figure out.

Ben and I laugh (on a good day) at the realization that on some level we thought our troubles would drop away at the border. There are old stresses and there are new ones as we “evolve” in our new surroundings. I suspect we are here for reasons we never dreamed of. Letting go of material and emotional “stuff” continues to drive us toward being the people we are meant to be. Finding our place here, finding our new selves here, will take time. There are so many possibilities-classes, groups, activities, volunteer work. I recently asked the assistant at the Lake Chapala Society (the organization that offers invaluable support to the gringo community here) what volunteers they might need. I’m a nurse. I could take blood pressures. Or, she replied, you could do something you haven’t already done all your life! Now there’s a concept! Perhaps we could even choose just to BE.