It rarely rains here in January so when the huge intermittent drops started hitting the stone floor of the courtyard outside my bedroom window, I woke up. 2:30 AM. Ruminating.
The Truth is…
This move has been dang hard. We’ve been sick &/or exhausted a lot of the time. We’ve been to doctors more in 14 months than in the last few years. Bronchitis, salmonella, flu? Our immune systems took a major hit starting last fall when we had repairs & remodeling going on at the same time that the estate sales folks were prepping for our big sale. It let up a little bit when we first got here. Adrenaline kicked in. We were excited, on a high. I guess we pushed too hard for too long. And tried to adjust to new food, new germs, new ways of doing almost everything. Then the construction started in October. One layer too much.
The noise here is very difficult sometimes. We’ve lost our view. Construction is going on on 3 sides of us, one side right up against our bedroom wall. A pick ax is a popular tool here. You wonder what they’re chipping away at hour after hour. The truth is that when you need to add electrical wires in a brick wall, you simply chip away a gulley to lay it in. Loud music doesn’t bother us much anymore. But roof dogs & hammers & buzz saws are over the top now. We expected noise but now we understand how much we valued our quiet back in our old neighborhood. Do people leave because of it? I don’t know. Maybe they just change locations. We will do the same.
Gringos here still get caught up in fast pace life…Mexicans, thankfully, slow it down. At a recent yoga workshop of about 20 gringos the teacher spoke of the relentless multitasking in our lives. I couldn’t help but wonder why this was a topic. Would a class of Mexicans hear the same speech? Didn’t I move to Mexico to enjoy its slower pace? That slower pace we know as “mañana”? Where tomorrow means “whenever I can get there”. Where people move slow enough to greet each other on the streets & celebrate with their families on a near monthly basis.
Integrate? Learn Spanish to integrate? We are truly just guests here so it warrants the effort to speak the local language. My original goal was to be able to interview elderly Mexican women & order food in restaurants. That last goal came easily. The first one has been a significant challenge with my poor memory & lots of distractions. Letting it go would take the pressure off. Until I needed to communicate. Guess I’ll keep going.
I’ve changed…I’m more tolerant & less judgmental. I try to understand that trash in the street is a reflection of at least 2 things: different values & a flailing infrastructure. I value my friends, old & new, more than ever. I’m more apt to accept them for who they are & who they have been or hope to be. For being human. Like me.
I’m more willing to try new things, to stretch myself. “Every day try something that scares you” quotes a magnet given by a friend. Moving here was the biggest leap, of course. Getting my Mexican driver’s license, my permanent visa, & taking road trips into unknown territory. Taking a small boat into a harbor full of humpback whales was something I never dreamed of doing, having been raised in a fearful home, afraid of deep (or murky) water (among other things). It was astounding to be on that silver-black bay with creatures from a world so much larger than my own. Connected to Mother Earth. Grateful.
Why do I stay? Because it is still a grand adventure. For the most part the local people are kind, friendly, & helpful. It is easy to create a community of local friends with the abundance of interesting people here. And I love Mexico, with all its quirks, & want to explore it further. Once we get our feet on the ground. Some folks seem to settle right in. Or maybe they just don’t talk about the difficulties. For us, retiring, closing down a business, leaving behind friends of many years, &, of course, family, coming to a new country where nearly everything is a learning curve & you barely, if at all, speak the language, ranks in those top 5 life events that can really send you tumbling. But we’re determined. We’ll find a way.
The rain stopped. Huge splattering drops we may never even notice in the morning.
I am rather new to your blog but I found this dose of reality helpful. I have been in the same home 31 years. There is moss growing under my feet and yet it feels like most bloggers sugar coat the challenge of moving to a new and different culture. Thank you for your honesty.
Hi Jennifer! So glad you found me. Sorry you missed my earlier posts as my feelings have morphed with time. Some have told me I’ll scare folks off with my honesty. To me it’s a necessary part of sharing my experience. Don’t let that miss grow much longer. There’s an old quote I love – With courage greater than your fear, spread your wings & you will fly! Best wishes.
Beautifully shared. Where did you go see the whales?
Banderas Bay off La Cruz and PV.
I didn’t hear the rain, but the always shady part of the lawn looks a little damp this morning. I always love reading about your view of our new home. So grateful that you & Ben will remain neighbors. Great pictures, as usual. And a delightful glimpse of Hazie to wrap it up in style.
Gracias! Glad we’ll be close also.
I’m glad you heard your 100 drops of rain. I’m glad you’re both hanging in there; I’m so proud to call the two of you my friends and to tell your story. It is a grand adventure I would find terrifying! Hang in there, and I’ll be looking forward to visiting you, hopefully next year. Much love. JOY. Color.
Dear, dear friend! I miss you so much! Thank you for your sweet words. We look forward to seeing you in April & on your visit here. Abrazos!
I’m very proud of you & Ben. I imagined it would be a difficult move, but I have faith in you. My wish is that you would make your clothes creations. You have a feel for color and fabric like no other, a true cloth artist!
How sweet to hear from you! To be reminded of my love of cloth. Textiles have definitely been a draw for me here. The truth is that any move after “sitting still” for 11 years or more would be tough. And there are books about how tough retirement can be. So I’m not surprised. But thinking that many of my posts have been rather glossy, it was time to balance the scales. Hope all is well with you & Keith.